i try and tune myself into what’s going on around me. so i can understand situations clearly and REACT accordingly. i would like to believe this much is the same for you or the next person.

well sometimes it’s not quite like that…

some people like to think that they are never in the wrong and that it’s okay to constantly disregard others to prove themselves….

that’s too easy! from now on, i’m going to try and live through the downfall of manipulation, heart break, and the loss of what was seeming to be an amazing relationship.


– i’m now staying in kelowna

-i’ve been chilling with people who really tune in

– feel ok

-many cool ootds

vancouver bound

as i come closer and closer to vancouver things start to fall apart.

as they do, i decide to go pretty crazy in my thoughts.

although my thoughts can be wild, and my actions can sometimes match, i love being able to say that i have things under control.

with that i’m gonna give y’all some of this months pics

god rest ur soul

so as a lot of people may not know, i wrote a song around seven months back. it was called “untitled”, and i wrote it to that same youtube beat and all and i just kinda left it. but recently when i went back through some of the music that i was working on, i came across it. and listening to it now, i really, really, was affected by it and it’s meanings to me.

i feel like the song is just mostly about how sometimes we try to so hard for people who can never return the favour. and when i re-listened to the “untitled” track, patterned it out and tried to butcher the mix (lmao), it really became god rest ur soul after being in a situation that really happened to me in just the past couple of days.

i’m sorry it has to be this way but it’s probably for the better..

i see these situations and hoped for better and hoped that you would get some rest. but not only for you but your soul too.

it feels too distant from the truth now than before.

that’s kind of the message behind the lyrics about us sipping from the same cup…like it’s a metaphor for the truth almost idk. we sometimes want to be so close to who we’re with that we could be seen sharing cups and shit in public but how could we ever get to that point if you just wanna be so dishonest with it?

anyways if you wanna listen to god rest your soul it’s available here, here, and here .

thanks for coming to my ted talk


just the other day one of the people closet to me had said he was having troubles…

varying from nature to nature, he landed on a subject that most can potentially relate too: expectations in relationships.

expectations can range from small things such as: social etiquette, respect for your elders, respecting a persons property, to even telling the truth one hundred percent of the time.

years ago, i went to the theatre with my father. we never had the best relationship, but i wont forget the times we had where things were going to some degree of normal. and at this theatre we watched a movie called “in time”. It came out in 2011, making me only 10 years old when i watched it… nonetheless, the movie fascinated me. the concept being, time is money really made me look at my past retrospectively at that time i spent before i was adopted.

now, i look back in hindsight to that time and think about all the struggle and agony i endured living with people i know didn’t love me. and i try be progress in ways avoiding those feelings at all costs. anything to cause that extent of pain and dementia is so wasteful of our time that it should be paid for. i feel that every year of my time is worth at least 5 million dollars, and its treated as less then 50 thousand a year until MAYBE death. but even before that, peoples time can be compensated for an even lesser amount of 15 grand.

a good friend of mine told me that our time on earth is like winning the lottery, and the time is money.

this very compounded idea couldn’t have been made without ever having some dimension of adversity present in her life. but the adversity also is what makes her come to that conclusion of herself. its a progression in time mixed with the adversity that needs to happen in order for us to understand our true value and energies.

t + a = inner understanding.

for myself, i understand one of the qualities you cant have an expectation for is your amount of inner understanding. when i enter an relationship that makes my world turn (which rarely happens lol rip) i try to hard and sometime come off as boring and fake. the reason being: im playing the guessing game when it comes to the other persons expectation, needs, or emotions